Oh my ears, whiskers and wiggly tail!

Six weeks until I turn eighteen.
Eight weeks until I graduate from high school.
Twelve weeks until my last exam.
Sixteen weeks until I get my ATAR score back.

Oh my ears, whiskers and wiggly tail!

Everything has begun to get really real. The though of life beyond high school had become terribly daunting over the past couple of days. After being a part of my high school musical (we did Alice in Wonderland and I played Alice for those who are interested) and having our last performance on saturday it became easy to see that all those months ago in our very first rehearsal I remember thinking how far away our performances were and that it seemed that they would never come! Now seeing that they have came and passed the next thing to put my energy into would be my exams at the end of the year to determine the university and course I get into. It's not completely calming to think that the thing I am most strongly working towards at the moment is the thing that will kickstart real life.

Perhaps I am putting too much pressure on it all. How many people stay in one career for all of their life? How many people change their mind and their university course? Plenty, I'm sure of it. What kind of eighteen year old can predict the next fifty years of their life? Whoever it is, I truly admire them but for the rest of us I have a funny feeling I'm going to have to dig deep and find myself, learn about myself and grow to fully understand what I want to do with myself. And sure, I've put down my university preferences and at the moment I have my heart set on a couple of courses but I'm open to change, I'm accepting of the idea that I will start next year and hate what I'm doing and change into something a completely different. I'm too young to set anything in stone. Youth needs to be about minimal commitments and wrong decisions that change your path and lead you somewhere that you didn't initially realize you wanted to be.

I don't need to be carrying around a heavy soul full of worry and stress at the moment, I'll save that for being middle-aged.